June 27

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Pushy People in MLM

By Bess McCarty

June 27, 2012


pushyOK, this post is gonna go a little deep…

Question: What’s really behind all the pushiness in MLM?

You know, the Facebook posts on your timeline from strangers about their business opportunity, being buttonholed to hear the deal they’re excited about, and the behavior that gives network marketing a bad name.

Answer:
It’s being more in love with their goal than you. Caring more about getting what THEY want, than what YOU want, feel, or need.

Ouch. Did that hit home at all? Could we all have some of that in us? Reality check now… I challenge you.. it’s not easy to see this in ourselves… And you know, if you can’t STAND those people, you know the saying, they are a mirror of YOU.

Do you get excited about your grand dream more than the nitty gritty tasks of serving people? Really seeing what they need from you? When it’s different than you expected, can you change and do that instead of your preconceived plan?

Or do you try to get them to be an actor in YOUR script? And try to get them to be what YOU want that fits your picture, rather than who they really are? This can be be prospects, customers, downline, or even your own family. This doesn’t leave room for the real them, or a real relationship. Just a dictatorship. Which of course can’t succeed.

How would you feel if someone wanted to use YOU for THEIR dream?
And was not interested in the real YOU?

Here’s a test:

1) Do you have PATIENCE to allow relationships to develop in your business?
To know like, and trust each other?
2) Are you able to LISTEN to their needs?
3) Are you able REPSOND to them in a way that works for them?
4) Do you CARE about helping them more than you care about the money?

I’m working on these myself. Selfishness can creep in like weeds in my garden! Gotta keep tending to them. How? Ask myself the feeling and needs underneath. Like in my Real Conversations process.

Pushy people are scared. We control to be safe.

I had a controlling friend who told me about a dream she had when she was a child. She was walking with her parents. The ground opened and they fell in. They were not there for her. She had to take care of herself, and others. Even on her deathbed, she bossed the hospital staff. So there’s fear there…

The healing? To renew one’s trust and relationship with God, Higher Power, nature, or whatever you look to. Relax again in the goodness of life. Write your gratitude list daily of how this Love reaches you. Hear others’ stories.

I just saw the “Untouchables” and “Men in Black”. Those guys wanted to stop the bad guys MORE than they wanted to live! Their success was because they were willing to DIE for their cause.

So, be willing to die!
That is, be willing to let your EGO and FEAR die! Let them be replaced by service to life. There is the security we are looking for. (This business is really a personal growth course with a comp plan attached! ๐Ÿ™‚ )

If you would like to go deeper, this is exactly how I help people in private coaching sessions. It’s also what the MLM Millionaire Club is all about. We do things in there to transform our programming. (My background is in psychology.)

What do you think? Next time you see a spammer on Facebook, send them this blog link? ๐Ÿ™‚

Here’s a little YouTube laugh for us today: “The Pushy Network Marketer”

Bess McCarty

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